Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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