Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
