i may or may not be watching the land before time
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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