have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
