I feel great
I just peed on a car
nutella sex= disaster
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
