3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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