is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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