I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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