PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
