What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
