Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize
