the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
