Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
