He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
