Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
