You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
