Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
