As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
