ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
4 words: hood of his car
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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