You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just found puke in my bra..
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
