I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
