hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
