have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Randomize
