What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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