so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
