I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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