I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
