I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Randomize
