can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
They are going to name an STD after you.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
