i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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