the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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