so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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