Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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