VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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