Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
