I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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