i don't plan on having that self control this summer
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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