Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize