my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I want a musical about memes.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
