You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
