I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
jump out the window naked night went bad
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