We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
