Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
