Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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