She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
