I hope mine doesn't look like that
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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