so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
