i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
