Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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