i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
